Personal Development

How to fake it

There you are. It’s right before the job interview or the big meeting or the speech, and you’re nervous. Really nervous. You want them to be impressed, but you’re just not sure you can pull it off. You’ll look stupid. They’ll see your nervousness and they won’t take you seriously.

You need confidence. After all, it is your best accessory.

Here’s a secret about confidence: You can fake it. Maybe not for long periods of time. But it can be faked long enough to get through that interview, meeting, or speech.

Seven steps to faking confidence

1. Visualize.

What does it look like to be confident? What does it feel like to rock the interview? What do you say? How do you act? Now, close your eyes and picture it. Picture everything about it, from your great handshake to your impressive answers to your witty quips. Watch yourself go through these actions and really take the time to feel the feelings of confidence.

2. Psyche yourself up.

Right before you’re about to get on the stage, you start feeling all of the uneasiness. Your palms sweat, your stomach flutters, your mind goes blank. This is the time to start giving yourself a pep talk (in your head; you don’t want to look totally unstable). Tell yourself that you can do it, you’ll be great, you’ll wow them, you’re the best ever. Talk yourself into it.

3. Smile – genuinely.

Confident people smile. Or, at least smiling makes it seem like you’re more confident. Either way. According to Malcolm Gladwell’s Blink we can tell the difference between the a fake smile and a genuine smile, so try your best to relax and have a genuine smile.

4. Use humor.

Nothing shows confidence and builds rapport quite like humor. Especially when done correctly. Courting Your Career points out that you should keep your humor politically correct and safe. Another caution: Be careful not to turn your humor into dumb jokes and nervous laughter. It won’t work. Think witty.

5. Don’t apologize.

Apologizing shows weakness. Don’t do it (unless you really screwed something up). Don’t tell the audience you’ve been sick lately, don’t apologize to the hiring manager about the smudges on your cover letter, don’t let your co-workers know you didn’t bring the right notebook to the meeting. Be confident in your ability to get it right without apologizing.

6. Control your movements.

A big sign of nervousness is odd movements. Pacing, touching your face, ringing your hair, playing with your jacket buttons. Bad, bad, bad. As much as you can, keep your movements natural, but controlled. If this is a big problem for you, make sure you include this in your visualizations and practice until you can don’t need the crutch of distracting movements.

7. Be confident.

When you act a certain way, you are a certain way. Think about it. This isn’t about being fake. It’s about putting yourself into a mindset that allows you to act a certain way and be a certain way. So, be confident.