Communication
The secret to good writing isn’t commas; it’s simplicity
When I taught English to college freshman with below average writing skills, I quickly realized that the problem wasn’t that my students were lazy or dumb or not trying. The problem was their writing had become too complicated. Way too complicated. (Yes, I know that’s a fragment.)
They had been trying so hard to add clauses and commas and big words that they could barely spit out a real sentence. Fragments, comma splices, and misplaced clauses were out of control.
So, we broke it down to the basics. We analyzed every word they wrote. And, even though some of them were frustrated by the process (especially at first), they all – every single one of them – could write decent sentences by the end of the semester.
Here’s the six-step process I used with them that will surely work for you:
- Look at every single word you write.
- Ask yourself, “Does this word help get my point across?”
- Take out useless words.
- Read it all together.
- Ask yourself, “So what?” at the end of each sentence.
- Repeat as necessary.
Useless words
Some words and phrases are extremely prevalent in roundabout writing. There’s nothing inherently wrong with these words and phrases; they simply don’t make for great writing.
Very
Does the word “very” add anything to your sentence? In most cases, probably not. What’s the difference between being “very sad” and “sad”? Not a lot.
It would be better to describe just how sad you are by saying, “I’m so sad that I can’t get out of bed.” That says a lot more than, “I’m very sad.”
There are
These two little words were so prevalent in my students’ writing that toward the end of the semester I promised to fail anyone who used them. About 80% of them would start off a paper like this:
“There are many reasons why I love baseball.”
The good news here is this is a complete sentence. The bad news is this sentence doesn’t really say anything. How about: “Baseball truly deserves to be called America’s favorite pastime.” Or, “From the first time I picked up a bat, I knew baseball would be my life.”
That
Although an essential word, “that” can really get in the way. Take my paragraph above. I could have written:
“The good news here is that this is a complete sentence.”
Instead, I wrote, “The good news here is this is a complete sentence.”
Seems small, right? Well, do it over and over and you’ve got a mess.
Whenever you see the word “that” in a sentence, read it again without it and see if it still makes sense. If it does, take it out.
Needless to say
I had a college professor say to me, “If it’s needless to say, then why did you say it?” Good point, huh? I still let “needless to say” sneak in sometimes simply because it feels right. If you like, go for it. But, in general, stick with Dr. C and delete it.
Utilize
Dr. C taught me this one, too. Utilize doesn’t mean anything. Use “use” instead.
Something like/Due to the fact that/For the reason that
These phrases, and others like them, are just clutter. They add no value to your writing. Get rid of them whenever possible.
Basically
“Basically, this project isn’t going to work.” You don’t need the basically. Just say, “This project isn’t going to work.”
This list could go on and on, but you get the idea. Once you start looking at every word critically, other needless words and phrases will just start jumping out at you.
So What?
When I first introduced this phrase to my students, they were a little taken aback. What is she trying to say? Why is she suddenly being so rude?
I wasn’t trying to be rude. I was trying to get them to think about their writing. Beyond words, you have sentences. Sometimes you need a sentence. Sometimes you don’t. After every sentence, my students asked themselves, “So what?” If they couldn’t answer the question, they either deleted it, combined it with another sentence, or reworked it so it had a substance.
Simply put, if it doesn’t add value, take it out.
Somewhere along the line our writing has become convoluted in an attempt to sound smart, to impress our teachers or bosses, or simply because we taught too much useless crap. Good writing isn’t necessarily a pristine use of commas or knowing when to use a dash versus a hyphen. Good writing is simple and concise. This doesn’t mean stupid or dumbed down. It means thoughtful and clear.
If it’s too complicated you won’t get your point across and you’ll leave your reader with the question: So what?
Brilliant! Even as someone who considers themselves a pretty good writer, this entry made me think a lot about my own writing.
So true! Good ideas don’t need to be dressed up in convoluted language. Good tips, too!
Do you ever listen to Grammer Girl podcasts - she always has similar good tips like this
@Vixel - Thanks! Sometimes it’s nice just to reflect.
@Jaclyn - Wow! Thanks for comparing me to Grammar Girl! I have listened to several of her podcasts, and I think she rocks. Thanks!
Isn’t the clause “the good news here is this is a complete sentence” grammatically incorrect? “This” is functioning both as a subject and an object pronoun.
What is it that you teach, exactly? Is it a new writing style suited for business-types? I’d like to find out more about it.
I personally found your article a bit irksome to read because it doesn’t follow traditional writing conventions and contains many grammatical and logical errors.
Normally, I wouldn’t have commented, because nearly every site I visit is written by dimwits who know nothing of grammar, but the would-be-ironic title of this article intrigued me, so I took the time to read.
I was a bit surprised to find blatant mistakes in your article, but it’s my understanding that this was done intentionally.
Please correct me if I am mistaken.
Basically the fact is that writers should utilize words intelligently so that there are very interested readers.
LMAO! @ the comment prior to mine! Whoever Smith is needs to re-examine his or her statement. It is not nice to be an asshole!
I go to college online and we have something called the Center for Writing Exellence (CWE). In this, we get to post our essays and the CWE checks for grammatical errors and plagiarizm. WOW! Wonderful, isn’t it? If I am not mistaken our essays come back with the same errors as you have pointed out! Ex. Very, there are or there is, utilize, needless to say, due to the fact… I can go on, but you get my point.
I think the article was very helpful for those who are trying to make their writings better. Less is more, take out the rhetoric, and the writings will flourish!!!
P.S. I may have spelled some words wrong; I have no spell check for the comments section, but you get my point! :o)
If it’s too complicated you won’t get your point across and you’ll leave you’re read with the question: So what?
typo and bad apostrophe in the last sentence of an article about better writing- priceless.
@Smith - I’m assuming you’re including me with the dimwits, but I appreciate your comment nonetheless. Writing about writing is a dangerous topic and I appreciate your insight. It may make you feel better to know that I no longer teach and my job really has nothing to do with writing. In fairness, you kind of missed the whole point of the post. It’s cool, though.
@Pedlar - Okay. That’s hilarious.
@E’lona M - I do get your point. It’s interesting that your college has you submit articles to the CWE. Do you graded before or after that process?
@Bob - Wow. That certainly is embarrassing.
You know, I was talking to someone close to me a while ago, and they made a very similar point. The beauty of the English language is that you may say a simple idea any number of ways, ranging from simplistic to overtly complicated… and the more simple the idea, the more likely it is to be understood.
And as I understand it, the goal of “language” is to share an idea; so what would the point of complicated words be for a simple idea?
In case that was confusing (I’m rather tired, and not listening to my advice), the point can be summed up with “If you can simplify your sentence while retaining the idea, do it,”, and also the whole avoid filler thing.
Assuming my point has been made properly, I’ll leave now. Just wanted to add my fifty cents. You know, so you could buy a cheap soda. Two cents doesn’t get anything, these days.
@Person 1 - Exactly. Why make it complicated and risk losing the message, when it can be simple and to the point?
Thank you for this article, it’s been a real eye opener. Though to be critical: “Simply put, if it doesn’t add value, take it out.” contains two unnecessary words.
@David - Thanks for the comment. I appreciate you taking a look at it with critical eye, too!
You’re welcome Angela, I spend a lot of time making sure my writing is of a standard acceptable to the audience that it is intended for. It was a pleasure to see someone point out the need to educate others in the discipline of ‘less is more’.
Accessible tips that make perfect sense. It seems logical not to over complicate writing and to only include informative words, even if it isn’t always possible and a few ‘unnecessary words’ sneak in!
Angela, thanks for this article. I will be sure to review this when I am writing to get a point across.
However, during most other times (mainly when I send out company-wide emails), I enjoy obfuscation in my writing to confuse, mislead, and torture my readers; I find enjoyment in making my readers think a bit harder than they’re used to and have found much laughter-filled satisfaction with this method.
For me, the most rewarding moment at my office has been when a co-worker approached me and stated that she did not understand why she feared emails from me, why when she read them she felt the urge to run away, or why her heart rate had increased and was accompanied by profuse sweating upon completion of reading.
If you could, please post an article explaining a method that will cause the effect my co-worker experienced on most readers as well and I will gladly add that post to my writing toolbox. :0)
@WebGems Thanks for the comment.
@Dexter Huh. Sounds like you have that one down already. Perhaps you should do a guest post. I enjoyed your comment!
Thanks for the information you provided on the secret to good writing. I found them so useful that I thought I should inquire whether you had written any book on English grammar. If yes, then I would like to purchase a copy.
While looking forward to hearing from you at your earliest convenience, my email address is ribhagui@yahoo.com.
Once again, thanks.
A useful article….
It will very helpful to me,because i am also have this problem…
I like to write more articles but i don’t because of my bad writing style….
I think your tips will helpful to me..
I just try it…Thank u
I have a bad writing style.your tips will give me a hope to improve myself.
Thank a lot
Well, I agree with most of what you so well articulated.
Most, unfortunately, when writing desciprtives,find it difficult to describe anything in other words than, awesome, oh my God,unique, utimate experience and the likes.
English is without any doubt the richest od languages. That 80% of the population choose to use only about 600 words is a catastrophe.
Most even showcase their business’ in this way.
Let’s be clear, displaying your business in a badly written, poorly created, low budget, unattractive, same as everyone else light - guess what you get? Exactly what you pitched for! A small piece of the low budget, same as everyone else, unattractive market and your prospects will suspect that if they do business with you, they will get more of the same!
Dare to write differently.
Great tips here that I will be sure to remember for future reference!
Excellent post. It actually inspired me to write a full-featured post on Writing simply for Business. I’ll attach the link to my comment name.
For the technical section on writing simplicity, I referred to this post because you’ve already covered most of the points very nicely. Thanks for the inspiration!
Great points you have there. I’d maintain that grammar or the use of punctuation (is that how it’s spelled) sucks when rule based. It can be fun and convey meaning too!
This is great! I need t improve my language here
I am a good writer and yet this post was extremely useful to me.
Why must some be so serious? Less is more period.
Why do the words exist if we are not suppose to use them?
This is why the English language sucks because it’s too complex.
My question is, if your vocabulary is decent and you want to use words that may sound pompous where do you draw the line? Just because the professor is lazy and refuses to think when they read fifty essays does not mean that students with an understanding of obscure but relevant words should avoid using them. Why can I not use the word rapacous, or veracity, or sepulchral? Is it because I these words are not suppose to be in my vocabulary?
[...] why is being a good writer so important to your career? Gaston Caperton, president of the College Board states, “Writing [...]
Well done. Thanks. (note only 3 words used
Hi Angela! Stumbled upon* this web page; nice article.
You may also appreciate the essay ‘Why I Write’ by George Orwell: http://www.amazon.com/dp/0143036351/
It contains a few examples of great writing that makes Mr Orwell my favorite writer by far. Based on your article, I suspect you’d like it as well.
* http://www.stumbleupon.com/