Personal Development

The dirty little secret of success that’s actually not dirty at all

You hear a lot about how to achieve success pretty much everywhere you turn— work hard, market yourself, brand yourself. This is all great advice to follow. But, there is something else that we need in order to be successful: Other people.

You’re thinking, “Yeah, I already know this. I read all about networking all the time. I’ve even read about it on Girl Meets Business here, here, and here.” And, if you’re not thinking that, you’re probably thinking, “I don’t need anyone else! I can do it myself!”

To the first group, networking is only a small part of it. Simply networking, whether in person or online, isn’t going to necessarily to success. Even if you take my advice and follow up after networking, it doesn’t guarantee you’re on the right path.

To the “I can do it myself” group, it sure does sound tempting to be a one-man (or woman) show. And, I certainly don’t doubt that it can be done. You’ll have a much easier and more productive time with the help of other people, though. You’ll also learn a lot along the way.

Let’s back up for a minute and focus on the word “success.” We’re generally talking success when it comes to business, but I’ll let you define success however you want to. That’s because whether you aspire to be a famous actress, an awesome waitress, or a CEO, the secret is still the same.

Surround yourself with smart, successful people.

It sure is fun to be the smartest, most successful person in the group, isn’t it? That may be the case, but it’s not challenging you. You can be friends with and network with whomever you want, but when it comes to your success, you should be seeking out the smartest, most well connected people you can find. These are the people you will learn from. These are the people who will lift you up to the next level.

Think of companies and their boards. Companies want only the best and brightest people on their boards. They want other leaders, other CEOs, other smart and accomplished people. Not because they can’t do it on their own. But, because they want their company to be the best out there, so it makes sense to have the best people making the big decisions. Think of yourself like a company: Who do you want on your board?

Find the right people to promote you and your ideas.

It turns out you actually can have the wrong people in your corner. Think about it: You may not want the office jerk to be the one to present your new idea to the boss. Or, you may not want that awful customer to promote your services. You need the right people to promote you.

One recent example of someone who surrounded himself with the right people is Dan Schawbel. While he no doubt welcomed the support of the entire blogging community for the release of his book Me 2.0, several key players in the Gen Y (and beyond) blogging community promoted his book: Rebecca, Tiffany, Ryan, and Monica, to name a few. He had the right people promoting his book. That, combined without a lot of factors, made it a success.

You, too, want the right people in your corner. Look for people who are well respected and well liked. These may not be the same people as in the “smart and successful” group, and that’s okay. This is the “likable” group. Make your connections broad, yet purposeful.

Be open to the help of others.

For some, accepting the help others means automatic defeat. This just simply isn’t true. Most people climb the ladder because someone on the rung above them gave them a hand.

The truth is people want to help other people. Especially those they see on the path to success. So, don’t think of it as a handout. It’s not.

So, why is it a dirty little secret?

Well, maybe it’s not quite that dirty or little. But it seems like few are willing to get to the heart of it: You need other people to succeed

It sounds one-sided.

Well, it shouldn’t be. You need to put just as much, if not more, into the relationship as you get out. This means leveraging your own connections, promoting others, and sharing your own knowledge with others.

It sounds manipulative.

It’s not. You’re not trying to dupe anybody. You’re not using anyone. You’re not even trying to get something for nothing. You’re simply aligning yourself with certain people, while being open to any and all (well, most) connections.

It sounds snobby.

Look: Nobody’s saying you should restrict your associations. There’s a lot of value in a large, diverse network. So, make as many connections as you can—just include some strategic connections in there as well!

The bottom line.

You need other people. Get this right, and you’ll no doubt be successful.

© 2009 Girl Meets Business.